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Humor

The complaint of Schrödinger's cat

From the LabLit science verse series

John Lowell 28 September 2008

www.lablit.com/article/421

I think it’s time for moving on:
Fire’s never lit. I haven’t seen
For weeks a bit of fish or cream –
Every day the same stuff from a tin,
(It's scarcely fit for dogs) and even then
I have to beg – I mew and ankle-rub
Till he sees fit to notice. Most undignified!

What is he doing all day long
Muttering and scribbling at that table?
And those dreadful friends!
That Werner! Half the night,
They argue, shout, and stamp about
(And after making such a fuss
About my boyfriend's singing!).

The one from Denmark's even worse!
Lumbering and mumbling;
Treading on my tail, not noticing.
Once he nearly sat on me
(Slipped out just in time), he missed me
By a whisker – I can see the headline:
FAMOUS FELINE CRUSHED BY BORE!

He's had the joiner in. Made this box
To fit me. What's it for? I don't like
The calculating looks he gives me.
Vivisection springs to mind –
I wouldn't put it past him!
Well, I’m giving none of my nine lives
To quantum physics. No bloody fear!
Sinister! I'm out of here!